How not to hate your husband after kids / Jancee Dunn.

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    • Publication Information:
      First edition.
    • Abstract:
      Summary: "A hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice."
    • Abstract:
      Summary: "Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage--and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Jancee, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate--and rebuild--your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children."--Jacket.
    • Content Notes:
      Introduction: Maters gonna hate -- Mothers, fathers, issues -- "Get off your ass and help out!": our harrowing encounter with the man from Boston -- Rage against the washing machine: how to divvy up chores -- Rules of fight club -- TGIM: how not to hate your weekends after kids -- Guess what? Your kids can fold their own laundry -- Bone of contention -- Kids: your new budget deficit -- Hot mess: less clutter, fewer fights -- Know that eventually it's going to be just the two of you again. Well, unless another recession hits.
    • ISBN:
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LJ Reviews 2017 March #2

Memoirist, essayist, and children's author Dunn (Why Is My Mother Getting a Tattoo?) offers readers a hilarious and scientific look at how men and women differ in both their workloads and feelings about child care and home chores. With intriguing insight, she travels through the decades yet maintains a focus on today's parents and the day-to-day dealings of the division of labor, seamlessly weaving her personal narrative into relevant research. For example, an Ohio State University study shows that "By the time [a] baby reaches nine months, the women had picked up an average of 37 hours of childcare and housework per week, while the men did 24 hours, even as both parents clocked the same number of hours at work." Despite that discouraging statistic, Dunn doesn't fall into a mode of "I told you so," but rather takes the high road, illustrating how male and female brains file neatly into evolutionary patterns. Verdict This truly fascinating text is delightful. Dunn's stories add laugh-out-loud moments, such as describing Grandma's snack cupboard as "Gran's bag of petroleum and animal by-products." One of the best books on the subject. Highly recommended.

Copyright 2017 Library Journal.

PW Reviews 2016 December #1

Dunn (coauthor of Cyndi Lauper: A Memoir) proves herself a clever, honest, and hilarious writer who isn't afraid to take her own marriage on a great experiment. Few writers would be courageous enough to lay bare such uncomfortable truths as her verbal abuse of her husband in response to his selfishness and how it may be threatening the normal development of their daughter. This book-length intervention tackles the whole spectrum of marital stressors, including dishwasher disagreement, financial infidelity, and weekend activity management. Dunn talks to experts in their fields, including $800-per-hour family therapist Terry Real, sociologist Michael Kimmel, and marriage researchers John and Julie Gottman. Her warm and funny prose will restore hope for moms—and dads—everywhere, as when she writes, "I've made myself reach for his hand when a fight is looming—even if I'm so irritated that I'd rather pick up a live rodent... the familiar contours of his hand remind me that this is the person I married, not the bogeyman." Her book should become a baby shower classic. Agent: Alexandra Machinist, ICM. (Mar.) Copyright 2016 Publisher Weekly.